Week Five

The Discipline of Submission

This week's blog is a little overdue.... good thing I'm not gettin paid for it, right? Oh... and good thing only 3 people read it :) Hahaha. I digress... At the moment I'm having a hard time focusing on last week's lesson because I'm in the middle of learning the meaning of simplicity in my complex world while getting ready for next week's solitude. For the week of solitude I have the awesome opportunity to spend a week in a cabin.... alone... in the middle of nowhere. I can't tell you how excited I am about this. Well, I could... but I'm leaving in the morning, so how bout I just tell you what all God did when I get back!And I also can't tell you where it is... because knowing some of my friends I'm sure I'd get a few scares :(

As I began reading about submission I don't think I realized how hard it would be to actually "do." One thing it did do was make me even more aware of my stubbornness and independent nature (which some may call a tad selfish). Being 32 and single definitely has it's perks (like freedom to do what I want, when I want, how I want...etc) but the downside to that "freedom" would be the struggle to lay down my own rights to care for others needs above my own. I'd have to say one of the most valuable things I'm learning through this is how to maintain the teachable spirit no matter what age, color, status, or sex. Doesn't matter whether you are married, single, have 15 kids or none... God desires for us to always be teachable, submitting to His authority above all else.

Now... it's very rare you'll ever catch me taking medication of any sort but last monday (first day of this discipline) I found myself at a painful crossroads. Do I stick to my guns, try to do it my way and potentially continue on with the most ungodly pain in my mouth?? Or do i just submit to those who probably know best in this situation and try and kill the infection their way. Welp, that was my first lesson... and as I submitted to the wisdom of the docs as I simultaneously prayed through it and used a few of my hippie remedies as well :) Point being, I had to lay down my own stubborn rights and completely trust in God as I put my life in other's hands. Thank goodness I did too... because by monday afternoon I had an emergency root canal and now feel 100% better!!!

Unfortunately, the discipline of submission has been more abused than any other disciplines. We must be very careful of some religious teachings on this so as not to be manipulated or controlled by deficient teaching that certainly do not edify the body of Christ as the word reveals. The goal of this discipline is freedom... and the second we take our eyes off the main focus we turn it into a law and become enslaved to it.

Just like I mentioned before in my story... it's an awful burden to always need to have your own way in life. Many negative emotions will arise as those who have a false need for this control demand that everything must go their way. As we submit "biblically" we are released from the bondage of this and now enabled to distinguish between authentic issues and stubborn self-will.

Richard Foster puts it best, "The biblical teaching on submission focuses primarily on the spirit with which we view other people." He also mentions that in submission we are finally free to really value other people and their lives, rejoicing in their successes and feeling genuine sorrow in their failures.

I have a friend who started a ministry and has several orphanages overseas. Recently he has had workers leave his place and begin to do some pretty awful things in the name of Jesus. These things are now beginning to concern their ministry as well as the orphans they take care of. It is a VERY ugly situation and the easiest thing to want to do would be to desire these people to be exposed and destroyed. I mean... we have grown up in a society that favors people to be punished for their actions. If someone says or does something bad, we want them to suffer for the pain they've caused. Rarely does our society believe in second chances... even more uncommon do we give people yet another chance or two.

It's hard to admit that I too have been in that place at one time. I remember looking at these little tiny girls in Cambodia who were already in and out of the sex slave ring and wanting to hurt the men who do this to them. But all that will do is give you anger problems and send you down a rabbit trail that leads to absolutely nowhere except to the powers of darkness. You see, even the victimizers or the perpetrators of whatever crime... are and have been victims themselves. As you become aware that you are a son or daughter of the king... their orphan spirit becomes more and more evident. Ultimately people do really bad things because they are truly unaware of God's amazing unconditional love for them therefore disconnected from the Creator of all that is good.

But just like my friend's orphanage and the bad decisions of the people that are intentionally (or unintentionally) hurting God's kids... the question becomes.... What does God want for them?? And I hope you honestly ask yourself that question tonight and have the courage to search for the answer, draw conclusions that align with the word, and perhaps even prepare to shift your thinking . Because if even the "thought" of hatred is murder in the Lord's eyes... then do we not deserve the same punishment?

All I know is that the more we submit to His authority... the more we see ourselves as He does and are able to receive that love. When we do, the capacity for grace deepens for others and we are able to see them how God sees them and desire restoration for their lost souls. Our God is a God of redemption. No matter the crime we all deserve death... and no matter how hard it can be to forgive.... He forgave us so who are we to hold on to the right to be angry?

Foster goes on to explain the difference between self-contempt and self-denial to clear up any confusion on the subject of submission through Jesus' eyes: "Self-contempt claims we have no worth, and even if we do have worth, we should reject it. Self-denial declares that we are of infinite worth and shows us how to realize it. Self-contempt denies the goodness of the creation; self-denial affirms that it is indeed good. Jesus made the ability to love ourselves the prerequisite for our reaching out to others (Matt 22:39). Self-love and self-denial are not in conflict. More than once Jesus made it quite clear that self-denial is the only sure way to love ourselves. (Matt 10:39)".

Lastly Foster goes through the seven acts of submission which I will briefly describe for you:

1- The first act of submission is to the Triune God- We yield our body, mind, and spirit for his purposes.

2- The second act is to the Scripture- We yield ourselves to first hear the Word, receive the Word, then obey the Word.

3- The third act is to our family- It's a commitment to listen, willingness to share and make allowances for one another.

4- The fourth act is to our neighbors and others we meet throughout our daily lives- If they are in need.... we help them.

5- The fifth act is to the believing community (the body of Christ)- Small or large every bit of service helps.

6- The sixth act is to the broken and despised- we must discover ways to identify genuinely with the downtrodden and the rejected.

7- The seventh act is to the world- We must be determined to live as a responsible member of an increasingly irresponsible world.

When we follow the acts of submission in honor of our Father... we gain spiritual authority which runs completely counter to the thinking of the systems of the whole world. Ultimately, we live in an "upside-down" kingdom and have the opportunity to live this out on earth. There's so much more we could discuss in this topic... feel free to write your own thoughts or questions and we'll walk through this together :)

The life of John

John was the little brother of James, cousin of Jesus and second cousin of John the Baptist.... now that's what I call a family legacy!

An excerpt from "Eat this book" by Eugene Peterson says of John: "He is a commanding figure. He was a pastor of marginal, politically and economically powerless Christians in a society in which their commitment to following Christ branded them as criminals of the state. His task was to keep their identity focused and their lives spirit-filled, their discipleship ardent, their hope fresh against formidable odds- the living, speaking, acting Jesus front and center in their lives. He didn't settle for mere survival; he wanted them to LIVE, really live- outlive EVERYONE around them. This is what prophets and pastors and writers do, and it is never easy. No easier now that it was for John".

One of the reasons I love this so much is because of this line "...He didn't settle for mere survival; he wanted them to LIVE, really live- outlive EVERYONE around them." I would invest everything I have into this anthem because I truly believe that God wants to use us to release as much glory on this earth as possible. How can we do this if we are sick or dead?

I know crap happens... this world has so much toxic evil in it that gets into our very bloodstream... but I truly believe His WILL and desire is for us to be healthy and whole in pursuit of being detoxed by Him in our mind, body, soul and spirit and then being nourished by all things good. But God graciously gives us the authority to make those decisions and those decisions lead us down certain paths. I sure can't explain why bad things happen... but I do know that every single thing on earth has potential to release God's glory if we praise Him in light of our circumstances- good or bad. I don't believe he brings upon the bad... rather has to allow it in some cases (for we know He cares more about the condition of our heart). We must seek for more than just merely surviving... He wants us to THRIVE. Even though the world is getting worse, we have the opportunity for MORE JOY, MORE FULFILLMENT, AND MORE LIFE- ABUNDANTLY... simply because we walk around in the kingdom of heaven on earth in submission to Him.

John died at the age 94 in his sleep... preaching until his very death. No one is too old or too young to be used by the Lord! Jesus did not call us to be "christians"... that was actually a term to mock the Christ followers... instead He calls us to be true disciples which requires much discipline and faithfulness. But oh what a beautiful joy it is to lay down one's life for the one who loves us so.

training for the half-marathon

Last week was hard to get running in because of me being in Nashville with lots of people to see and not a whole lot of room to do much else other than my yoga school. I was able to squeeze an amazing hike in one of those days with an incredible friend, as well as run a time or two. Let's hope my endurance comes back quickly and I'm able to catch up before too long :)

Week Four

The Discipline of Study

Interestingly enough... I spent more time studying this discipline than I did actually applying it to my daily routine this week. With that irony stated, I feel as though I owed it that much... and perhaps learned more this way. It also seemed like every sermon I listened to, book I read, or training manual I looked over had to do with the importance of study and gave me very valuable tools on how to go about it properly.

You see, most of us never even scratch the surface of what 'intentionally studying something' has to offer. Rather, most of us I presume... are reaping the harvest of studying things 'unintentionally'. Whether we like it or not..."ingrained habits of thought that are formed in our brain WILL conform to the order of the thing being studied. What we study determines the kind of habits that are formed, which is why Paul urges us to focus on things that are true, honorable, just, pure, lovely, and gracious, " according to Foster. Therefore it is beneficial and crucial for us to a

ll know... before picking up just any book, watching just any flick, listening in on just any conversation, or getting 'involved' with jus

t anyone... the mind will always conform upon which it concentrates.

So then.. if concentrating means: to focus one's attention of mental efforts on a particular object or activity, I'd like to pose a simple question to start. What objects or activities are we most interested in, and second- what is taking up most of our time? Whether it be work, kids, television, sports... I encourage you to write some of these things out now. This may help us identify things that perhaps we didn't even realize our mind was susceptible to conforming to. It may also be useful in guiding us in the direc

tion of finding more truthful, honorable, purifying, and nourishing things to concentrate on or study.

As for me, I have always had the best of intentions in life. But all of my hopes, desires, dreams and goals amounted to nothing without the proper steps in that direction. At the moment I'm also reading "The principle of the path" by Andy Stanley. Talk about a wake up call... man. I'm beginning to see how many years I spent making 'un-intentional' mistakes which quickly led me down a path of destruction and discomfort making it a lot easier to walk in the flesh rather than in the spirit. I always prayed that I would be 'used by the Lord' and that 'He would lead me to the right jobs and relationships, etc'... yet I was making very poor decisions in life then wondering where God was in the outcomes.

Now I see that the "temporarily satisfying" decisions I was making for myself were all based on the very things I spent most of my time concentrating on. Sure, I was attending church on sundays and going to a home group... but in my spare time I was going to parties looking for someone to pay unhealthy attention to me, or watching filth on television, or having meaningless shallow conversations with people I'd probably never see again. Now that I've become a little older, my eyes are being opened to the "predictable predicaments" we can easily get ourselves into because of lack in understanding our responsibility in the daily decisions as well as the habits formed by our concentration of choice.

"Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect." Romans 12:2 Thank God that His grace gives us the means by which our inner spirit is changed! If we desire to know the will of God then we must choose to be transformed by Him daily by what we eat, think, watch, read, hear, and spend time doing. Obviously, God is the one who will change us... but He so lovingly gives us the power of decision because of His awesome character and nature.

Now, rather than be overwhelmed with the great responsibility He's given, all we have to do is begin by being still and listening.... resting in His presence. Ask God to reveal things in this world that are nourishing for your soul and that will build you up in the spirit and give God the ability to transform you to His likeness. Also ask the Lord to reveal the toxic things in your life that are impairing your judgement thus making you weak... as the enemy would have it. The word of God is FULL of all the wholesome nourishment you could ever need... but it will have little or no power in our lives if we don't read it. It's also so beneficial to observe God in other things which we'll get to shortly....

According to Foster the discipline of Study involves four steps. 1- Repetition: Initially it is not even important that the person believe or understand what they are repeating because the inner mind is being trained and will eventually respond by modifying behavior to conform to the affirmation. (Works equally with truths being told or lies being heard). 2-Concentration: the human mind has an incredible ability to center the mind, this natural ability is enhanced when, with singleness of purpose, we center our attention upon a desired object or study. (Unfortunately, we live in a culture that does not value this but rather distraction and hurry). 3- Comprehension: this step focuses on the knowledge of truth which catapults us into a new level of growth and freedom leading to insight and discernment providing the basis for a TRUE perception of reality. 4- Reflection: defines the significance of what we are studying. When we ponder the meaning, we come to hear and see in a new way... this demands humility.

"If you abide in my word, you are truly my disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." Jesus, in John 8:31 &32 I don't know about you guys... but i wanna be FREE! Therefore, I wanna know the whole truth and nothing but the truth. And yes, we CAN handle the truth! We desperately need the truth.

Foster gives other helpful hints as we study books of the bible, schooling, or others. We must first understand: what is the author saying? Then we need to interpret: what does the author mean? Lastly we should evaluate: is the author right or wrong? It's so important to remember as we enter into reading or studying that we need to be a student- listening to what God wants to say to us, not just what we want to hear... because if we search shallow enough we will definitely find some temporarily statisfying feelings. But what we are REALLY dying for is something God REALLY desires to give us: LIFE-transforming truth.

Last but not least Foster asks that we also pay close attention to the reverent observation of God in nature. This Chapter was one of my fav's because I have such an innate love for God's creation and find so much energy and joy when I am able to sit and reflect on everything beautiful He has made for His kids. I encourage you to spend more time studying every living thing... from trees, to animals, to people, to the sunset, to the flowing river. God so desperately wants us to hear His voice and see His fingerprint in EVERYTHING He created... so let us watch, listen and learn.

"For you shall go out in joy and be led forth in peace; the mountains and the hills before you shall break forth into singing, and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands." Is 55:12

Earlier this week I rented the film Hugo that won all sorts of awards this year. One of my favorite moments was when the boy was talking about His father's purpose in life that was to fix broken things. As the little girl asked the boy what His purpose was... you could see that He was less worried about what his title was and more concerned about knowing who is father is and was. My revelation? Well, the more you know your Father... the more confident you become in your purpose because basically our purpose is to know Him more. And when we fall in love with Him and make decisions that glorify and honor Him... we conform to His likeness as our minds become renewed by His truth and can't help but overflow with His authentic love to the world.

The life of James, son of Alphaeus

Unfortunately, there is not much written about this James and what is written about him may even be confused with the other James' in the bible. This James was the brother of Matthew (the other Apostle) and son of one of the Mary's. It has been said that he was stoned in Jerusalem for preaching Christ and buried by the sanctuary.

What I find very interesting is what little facts I can find about this man. This makes his life even more mysterious to me. Since He was not one of the more noted disciples or "famous ones", I'm almost attracted even more to his story... which may never be known on this earth.

Our modern day culture seems to drive this ever increasing pressure to "be somebody" or more of an individualistic way of thinking. There is no doubt in my mind that there was a reason there were twelve of the disciples and that every imperfect one of them had a part to do that made a beautiful whole. Yes, we must individually seek a lifestyle of truth, wholeness, purity, and honor while collectively coming together for the cause of Christ agreeing with one another in unity and love.... or else, we'll wait unnecessary amounts of time for true revival.

This man may not be "known" but he has a story. He followed Christ, was part of a group of men that helped spread the gospel all over the world and was one of the few willing to die for it. We've got to have a greater desire to make HIM known than our efforts put forth in trying to make some sort of a name for ourselves in this world that will fade away. Thank you James for unintentionally changing lives thousands of years later by your silent example- no words necessary :)

Training for half-marathon

So far this week I've run about four days. I can already feel my endurance building... and I'm actually getting to the place where I like it!!! Crazy huh? I went 5 miles in one day only stopping for a few walking breaks in between... I was so ecstatic!

Unfortunately I found out today I have some sort of infection in my body and may have to get a root canal soon. It's been awhile since I've experienced pain like this so I'd really appreciate your prayers. I hope to move through this quickly to gain all of my strength back and continue running according to schedule, but I know God's got it! Excited about the lessons in this one as well, looking forward to the rest of my training season.

Please let me know if I can be praying for you in any way!! Love all of you so much, I hope you were encouraged somehow today.

Week Three

The Discipline of Fasting

This week I experienced something a little more painful than the past few weeks. I truly felt God going to deeper more hidden places in my soul sheddin

g light in such a way that again allowed me to see more bits of my human nature that cause me to fall short of His glory. But honestly, without those... we'd never recognize our GREAT need for Him, His love, forgiveness, grace, salvation and powe

r (to sum it up- the cross). Now I realize that I don't want these dusty places in my heart revealed just so He can patch me up and I can be more clean and perfect.... but rather so I can be in a constant state of desperate need, discover humility in the awareness of my own humanity, and have the grand opportunity for God to then remove those hinderances so I can receive more of the ever flowing love rushing in mad pursuit from His heart to ours.

I had first decided that I would fast everything but veggie and fruit juice this week. So... I borrowed my friends juicer, bought the supplies and off we went. By the end of the first day I slowly eased my way into the daniel fast :) (whic

h is pretty much the same thing except you can eat nuts and grains as well) So... from monday to friday that's what I did. Although, as I was reading the fasting chapter in Richard Foster's "Celebration of Discipline" I quickly began to see the value in Christ's "recommendation" to do so. And that, instead of me thinking that I was fasting from certain things... I was actually FEASTING on the word of God. As we now know fasting is a discipline, and according to Foster discipline brings freedom. So being disciplined in an area that Jesus clearly supported through is own actions is something that anyone who follows His ways should seek to strive for. What may begin as a "difficult sacrifice" will only end

in complete and utter blessing if He remains the center and THE reason in which you participate.

There are countless things that we DO here on earth that Christ never did... or would probably never do if He were physically present right now. Going off biblical principles alone and considering the fact Jesus would be a pretty fantastic steward of His temple.. I doubt He would ever use a credit card, eat fast food, watch tv, live in

a gated community, waste hours on facebook, or be too religious. I'm not knocking anyone who does that necessarily... i'm just sayin I bet Jesus might have more eternal issues on his plate, that's all :) And perhaps we should too? I've been questioning myself on that subject for a little while now reevaluating everything I do... asking myself if it's beneficial for the kingdom or simply toxic.

On the flip side there are plenty of things Jesus did do that we don't give much thought about today. It's not because they are completely irrele

vant... but maybe we assume God doesn't expect us to carry out some of those things in the crazy busy world that we live in. Then again, is that lifestyle something we ourselves have created?? And/or is it possible to live and breath a still, peaceful, joyful life despite all the madness swirling around us? As a bit of encouragement for all of you, I'm finding that is becoming greater possibility every single day I discover more of God's treasures wrapped up in practicing these amazing spiritual disciplines that are so difficult to initially slow down for... but simplistic to perform, revolutionary to soak in, and life- altering.

In Matthew 6:16 Jesus says, "And WHEN you fast..." almost assuming that we will, following it with proper instruction on how. "Jesus did not command fasting. But it is obvious that he proceeded on the principle that the children of the kingdom of God would fast. For the person longing for a more intimate walk with God, these statements of Jesus are drawing words," said Foster. Wow! So instead of us, his children, saying "ah dad... really? fasting? do you realize how hard that is? ugh... not again." We GET to react with pure joy knowing it's actually an act of honor and praise to the King, our dad, who loves us

so incredibly much and desires for us to draw near. The absolute safest place we could ever be is in His presence. Sure, you don't always know what's gonna happen... but you CAN be fearless, full of peace, and live in utter excitement for sittin

g at His feet and learning more about His great and awesome mysterious power.

Now there are many "benefits" to fasting like physical body, success in prayer, spiritual insights, etc... but like Foster so wisely put it- "these must NEVER replace God as the center of our fasting... if our fasting is not unto God, we hav

e failed...this is the only way we will be saved from loving the blessing more than the Blesser."

There are a few different ways of fasting mentioned in the bible. One would be the "partial fast" which is basically a restriction of diet but not total removal of food. Daniel lived this one pretty consistently. There is also the "absolute fast" which is abstaining from both food and water. (Esther 4:16 and Acts 9:9). This of course would be something you would need to make CERTAIN God was telling you to do, and even then pay close attention to listening to your body and make sure a few others close to you know what

you are doing. (I'm seriously getting cotton-mouth as I type). And then of course there was the time Jesus fasted from food (and "noise") in the desert for 40 days. (Luke 4:2)

This book even suggests easing into a fasting type of discipline where you might cut out one or two meals a day a week to start, then maybe eventually fast for a whole day. Many people have made this a normal part of their lifestyle dedicating the day to really feast on the word of God expressing their hunger for more of Him! I actually h

ave a friend of mine younger than me who

has been doing this for over 10 years now. He would probably tell you that He's never regretted one missed meal... and honestly, he's one of the most authentic guys I've ever met. I hope to get to the place where I can do this very soon...

Like all of those stories above and many hundreds of thousands since then, when we set aside things of earthly importance in honor of Christ... when we make room.... He WILL move. In those moments when the pain hungers seem unbearable on this physical planet we are actually speaking volumes in the spiritual tearing down walls and breaking weapons of the enemy by silently representing our ultimate hunger

for more of Christ himself. How close can we get to the cross? Well... how close do you really wanna be? If there really is no greater love than His now or forever more... then i want to know, hear, see, feel, receive, and freely give as MUCH of it as possible while I'm still alive! Is there really anything more pressing than that?

"Fasting can bring breakthroughs in the spiritual realm that will never happen in any other

way. It is a means of God's grace and blessing that should not be neglected any longer...." declares Foster.

(This picture is taken from the place of transfiguration (if i remember correctly) looking out over the Sea of Galilee. I'm sure a lot of the "fasting" we've talked about took place around this body of water, and somewhere along the shore most of the Apostles were called. Every time I visit this place I'm moved in an incredible way... if it weren't for those men saying yes, and others who have truly followed Jesus- would we even know? What about the rest of the world?? Will we follow His call that began by this beautiful sea?)

The Life of James (son of Zebedee)

It seems as though this James, including his brother John and the other Apostle Peter, were 3 of Jesus' closest friends... or inner circle, if you will. He even dubbed the brothers the "sons of thunder" at one point in Mark 3. Soon after Jesus called Simon and Andrew to follow Him after finding them casting their nets into the water... He finds James and John with their dad mending their nets. Then in vs. 22 of Matthew 4 it says, "Immediately they left the boat and their father and followed him." Often now I wonder what in the world that conversation must have sounded like??? I'll let you use your own imagination on that one... but what would it take for you drop your only source of income, way of life and loved ones to follow Him that day? And what does it really look like to follow Him now?

Some interesting facts about James' life is that, along with Peter and John, he was included in a few more significant historical moments than the rest of the disciples. The three boys were there for the raising of Jairus's daughter (Mark 5:37), present at the Transfiguration (Mark 9:1), and the agony in the garden of Gethsemani (Matt 26:37). It's also possible James and his brother got the nickname "the sons of thunder" because of their evangelical zeal and temper as well (Luke 9:54).

Also along with their mother, the brothers had an earthly ambition to sit on either side of Christ on his thrown... not yet fully understanding the spiritual nature of the kingdom. Even in their ignorance Jesus says, "But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be slave of all. For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many." (Mark 10:43-45) I can only imagine they felt quickly put in their place.

About 15 years after these words, according to most biblical scholars, James was put to martyred by the grandson of Herod the Great in order to please the Jews and make a spectacle of the Christian church and an example of evangelicals like James. Interestingly enough, some say that the guy that actually led James to judgement was convicted by his testimony, accepted Christ and they were beheaded together.

Wow, who would've thought... another normal fisherman dude on the Sea of Galilee whose life was changed forever on that day a guy named Jesus passed by and asked them to follow. I'm sure James had no earthly idea the temporary suffering that awaited him... nor did he realize the LIFE of adventure, mystery, excitement, miracles, salvations, testimonies, and pure joy that he was to experience before stepping into another eternal realm filled with even more awesome goodness! The funny thing is we are all in our own little boat today with our own little lives and our cute little nets... Jesus is passing by calling out for you to follow and trade in your ordinary lives for extraordinary ones. Following Him is ANYTHING but boring and there is absolutely nothing to fear, all you gotta do is step out of the stinkin boat, follow the shepherd's voice, and step into his footprints.

Training for half-marathon

This was probably one of the most difficult weeks so far in training as well. I think I might have run about 2 or 3 days this week? And on one of those days I chose to run at the park and about half way through began fighting a battle with myself I had never expected. As was jogging my body felt as though it was saying, "you know... i don't really want to run today, so i'm gonna make this as hard as possible for you." Right then and there we had it out. Yes, ok!! I was that crazy lady you passed the other day practically screaming at her body commanding it to do as it was told!!! Haha. Then I began to see this pride, stubbornness, anger, and forcefulness come to the surface which felt and looked sooooooooo ugly. Blaaaaaa. I hated those things for being in me somewhere and just wanted them OUT! Needless to say most of my run that day was a frustrating walk, but I prayed and fought in the spiritual realm for freedom for the majority of 3 miles I'd say. It reminded me of this paragraph in the book, which was probably yet another reason I was experiencing some of this:

"Once the primary purpose of fasting is firmly fixed on our hearts, we are at liberty to understand that there are also secondary purposes in fasting. More than any other Discipline, fasting reveals the things that control us. This is a wonderful benefit to the true disciple who longs to be transformed into the image of Jesus Christ. We cover up what is inside us with food and other good things, but in fasting these things surface. If pride controls us, it will be revealed almost immediately." Also David writes is Psalm 69:19, "I humbled my soul with fasting". Oh man, is that ever true.

Week Two

The Discipline ofPrayer

This week as I began to research the act of prayer I found many good nuggets of knowledge from men who've lived it. There is so much on the topic of prayer that it'd be impossible to share it all, but I'll do my best to sum it up and leave the rest up to you to discover! I just want to thank God for the places He's led me to this week in books, in the word, and revelations in my own prayer time.

I agree whole-heartedly with Richard Foster when he says, "God always meets us where we are and slowly moves us along into deeper things." Over time as we prepare, train, seek, and listen we will pray with even more authority than present day. (When I saw "authority" I hope you understand that I don't mean authority over God, but authority WITH God against the powers of darkness). Foster also professes that prayer ushers us into the perpetual communion with the Father and it is both LIFE-CREATING and LIFE-CHANGING.

I truly believe that if you don't see the importance or value in prayer

then there will be little power in your words, very little authority in the spiritual realm, and no confidence in a mighty God who desires to do so much in and through you!!! Prayer really can move mountains but truth is... most Christians are not even sure they believe this so their efforts are weak and sporadic. There is still another camp of believers that I've heard say, "Well... He's gonna do what He wants anyway, so what's the point?"

Before we move any further I challenge you to think for a second how you REALLY feel on the subject of prayer. Write out some of your concer

ns, disappointments, and frustrations. Perhaps you've assumed things about prayer and how God works? Or have been told something that just wasn't biblical? I have no clue where you are at in this journey... but what I do know is that there is definitely POWER in praying God's will for your life, your family, the government, the lost, the suffering, and the sick. I also know that it's a conversation with a God who desires to have an intimate relationship with you. And don't forget about the unseen battles that go on daily we are responsible to stand firm in as we hold onto His promises and truth. Victory in the kingdom

and in your heart is what He's longing for...

So... what exactly is prayer? Well as Graham Cooke puts it, "Prayer, in its simplest form, is finding out what God wants to do and then asking Him to do it."

Why? Why is prayer so important? "In prayer, real prayer, we begin to think God's thoughts after him: to desire the things he desires, to love t

he things he loves, to will the things he wills. We are being taught to see things from his point of view." Richard Foster

When we pray we are dwelling in the most high... and resting in His shadow (Ps. 91:1) We are actually tapping into a source of communication that no one else on earth can possibly accomplish without a relationship with the Father. The fact that there are some out there who have accepted Christ into their lives but don't desire to take advantage of this incredible form of communication with the Creator of the universe i

s mind-boggling to me! We actually have the ability to enter into an ongoing conversation with the trinity and find out how to pray in God's will!! FASCINATING!

What happens when we pray? "He will teach us to look beyond the natural into the supernatural realm and see the Kingdom of Heaven at work in every need. It will no longer matter what life, people, or even the enemy throw at us, because we will be able to hear the conversation in Heaven and understand that Go

d is at work all around us." Graham Cooke

How do we pray? "We must hear, know, and obey the will of God before we pray it into the lives of others," Foster. Jesus tells us to come to Him as children... Openness, honesty, and trust are evidence of our communication as children to our Father.

We must first find stillness. This is why it was so

valuable that they started with meditation in the spiritual disciplines. "Rest is our best weapon against the enemy, because rest allows us to hide in our secret place in God, " says Cooke. "... and without stillness, our experience with God is limited." Truth is, the enemy hates you but would never chase you into the holy of holies because he knows what fate awaits him there. Just like the word teaches in Psalm 100 we must enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise, THAT is where a true prayer life begins...

In YWAM we used a method of praying that basical

ly led us into intercession using the basis of that prayer. I know God can speak to us any where and in any way He wishes... but I also know that there can be things that hinder our ears from hearing. These are biblical things I found that help align my body, mind and spirit with His will for me and others I'm lifting up to Him. Perhaps they will be applicable to your prayer life as well.

1- Praise and thanks to God (Ps 100:4) 2- Confess sins and walk in forgiveness (Ps 24:3) 3- Silence the voice of the enemy (James 4:7) 4- Silence yo

ur own thoughts (2 Cor. 10:5) 5- Ask the Holy Spirit to come and speak to you (Jn 16:13) 6- Wait in silent expectation (1 Kings 19:12) and 7- Pray/act in faith of what God reveals to you (1 Jn 5:14).

For years I had no clue what it meant to pray like Jesu

s, the apostles, some of the spiritual giants of the bible or of our own time. To be honest it's a journey of discovering more of God's deep mysteries that I'll be on till I meet Him, but it's a journey worth seeking for sure. I'd like to share a little bit of my story to encourage you wherever you are and to challenge you to always be hungry for more of Him. When you are... you'll be less satisfied with the world and more excited about seeing His will on earth come to life. Then you'll experience the blessing of being a part of it!!!

My eyes were finally opened to a whole new life of prayer and intimacy about 5 years ago. All I know is that I was desiring to know God more and willing to do whatever it took to become closer to Him and His heart for me and the world. I put my life "on hold" for 6 months for ywam... only to find out that it had been "on hold" for 27 years and I was just waking up for the very first time. Ywam was just a tool God u

sed in my life to allow me to be away from distractions and clearly hear His voice... and man, I am so glad He did.

We prayed so much as a corporate body that I almost got sick of it at first. God was training my prayer muscles during this time... even though I hadn't quite come to the full revelation of prayer yet and it's worth in the kingdom. Somewhere along the way I stumbled upon "prayer languages". To be honest, at first I thought it was pretty strange. I had been told so many things growing up about this and found it hard to believe in its importance. I remember asking God that if it was a gift He desired for me than I wa

nted to receive it. A few days later we were walking around a church praying over the pews for revival. I walked up to the cross in the front of the auditorium, knelt down... and something broke in me. All of the sudden I started praying in this language I did not know, but there was this beautiful interpretation in my head that was undoubtedly the heart of God. I realized that I was actually tapping into that heavenly conversation in that moment at the throne of God and praying in His will. WOW!!!!! Seriously, so cool!!!!

Since that moment Papa has shown my all sorts of things through prayer and it's now such an exciting part of my life and connection with Him. I'

ve found that instead of just telling someone I'll pray for them later I usually pray for them right then.... whether it's on the phone, in the grocery store, mall, on a busy street, or in a cafe. Whatever! The power and love these people feel is instant... straight from the Father to them.

I also find that when I pray for people I usually get a picture, confirming word, song, or scripture for them. Recently this has been happening a lot and it's amazing to see the receiver accept it and rejoice because of the personal love and confirmation God has delivered to them. A lot of times if I don't have anything specific to pray about God will bring it up during that time of meditation and petitioning. The key is to trust it is really Him who is speaking to you and not the enemy or yourself. If you prayed through those steps mentioned above you can rest in the fact He knows what He's doing... just m

ake sure it aligns with the word of God.

I find it so important now to realize that our battles are spiritual, but to spend less time intimidated by the enemy and more time fascinated with Christ. When we praise and worship Him in this place, walls in the spiritual WILL come down and we'll begin to see victory in the physical. Everything that comes into existence is something He already spoke. God wants to partner with us in bringing His very glory to earth. What He wants of us is to find these things hidden in His heart and with our faith in action bring the promises alive that move the answer (He already created) from the unseen to the seen. He really just wants to make visible what He's done and He wants us to receive the bl

essing of being a part of that. Man, He freakin loves us so much!!! I can hardly fathom it sometimes!!! Now when I read The Lord's Prayer in Matthew 6 it really comes alive!

Bill Johnson, a pastor's sermons I frequently listen to, said..."God didn't leave us just so He could come back and rescue us, how else do w

e think His glory will cover the earth?" Basically He strongly believes, as do i, that we are not a factory that makes glory ourselves by any means... but we are definitely a vessel in which that glory flows through. Every prayer, every miracle, every salvation is a burst of God's glory on this earth that will continue to spread until His return.

I'm gonna end this with a story Bill mentioned that really hit home with me. It goes... A man was talking to his daughter about anchors of ships one day. He asked her how big of one you'd need for a boat that fits in a tub. She replied with her fingers slightly spread apart, "about this big". Then he asked her how big of an anchor yo

u would need for a boat that fit into a swimming pool. Her arms spread wide as she answered, "about thiiiiiiiis big". Then he asked how big of an anchor you would need for a ship in the ocean... and her arms could not reach wide enough nor could her brain barely fathom it. Then he said... "honey, God is promoting you to deeper waters, this means you need a bigger anchor...that anchor is PRAYER."

The life of the Apostle Andrew

"Accept me, O Christ Jesus, whom I saw, whom I love, and in whom I am; accept my spirit in peace in your eternal realm." According some historians, this was the last thing Andrew said after being tied to a cross tightly for three days in Greece for preaching the Gospel.

(This is a picture I took in Israel with a statue made to honor the disciples of Christ in the foreground and the Sea of Galilee, in all of its splendor, in the background. I'm amazed at how much the bible comes alive when you are standing on the very banks they walked and talked with Jesus on... )

Andrew and his brother Peter were both fisherman on the Sea of Galilee. Last time I was there visiting I went to a place right on the shore that had recently found pieces of one of the fishing boats from around that time they presume. I stood in this room for a long time looking up and down the boat trying to imagine what life was like for these disciples and the moment when everything changed for them. I have to say I got pretty emotional standing before this physical representation of the spiritual calling that Christ has on all of our lives. First, they encountered this man... Second, they watched Him and listened. And third... they came to know and love this person named Jesus so much that when He called them they were ready. These men put down their nets, abandoned all they knew and followed Him.

I also couldn't believe in that moment that I was standing so close to a boat that Jesus himself might have been on. Who even knows if this was the actual boat Peter walked out of to meet him, or the one Jesus was sleeping on before He calmed the storm!?! With all of that said... when Jesus called, Andrew was the first to respond and follow. It's said that Peter, his brother, was a fisher of men for the masses... but that Andrew was a fisher of men for individuals: emphasizing the significance in both.

It's pretty amazing to me that Andrew traveled as far as Russia, Turkey and Greece to share the good news of Christ even to the point of death. No matter how much pain He was feeling by the third day of hanging there on the cross, its said that Andrew was still professing the love of Christ to all who would listen. My desire is that I would have the same courage, strength, passion and stamina that Andrew had. We can learn so much from this one man's life.

Training for half marathon

This week I'm learning perseverance as I cross over the 3 mile mark. Everything in me wants to succumb to the lie that I'll never be able to do this or I may hurt my body in process. But every single time God gives me that extra boost of faith I need to make it through that run. I still find it hard getting excited for a long run, but I'm gradually getting there!

Tying in all together: "Occasional joggers do not suddenly enter an Olympic marathon. They prepare and train themselves over a period of time, and so should we in prayer. When such a progression is followed, we can expect to pray a year from now with greater authority and spiritual success than at present." Richard Foster

I realize that if I keep running I will build up the muscles I need to run the long race ahead... and see more and more victory in the arena's God will place me in. He wants to do the same for all of us. He knows what we can handle, but He wants us hungry for more. The more we are, the more He'll train us in those areas and the more we'll be prepared for... so we will not be injured along the way or have to quit the race. We are warriors of Christ and He's called us to be fishers of men... He desires for us to hand over our mind, body, soul and spirit so He can nourish us and build up our strength so we are fit to serve Him at full capacity and enjoy every minute of it- thriving instead of simply surviving. That's what makes us different and only He can do that in us!

Week One

The Discipline of Meditation

"In contemporary society our Adversary majors in three things: noise, hurry, and crowds. If he can keep us engaged in "muchness" and "manyness," he will rest satisfied. If we hope to move beyond the superficialities of our culture, including our religious culture, we must be willing to go down into the recreating silences, into the inner world of contemplation. Though it may sound strange to modern ears, we should without shame enroll as apprentices in the school of contemplative prayer".

As I shared with you before, I'm reading and studying Richard Foster's "Celebration of Discipline" during the next twelve weeks taking one discipline and focusing on it for the week. This week I spent an entire hour each morning in complete silence. Me... can you believe it? Ha. The girl who can hardly sit still unless she's sleeping or eating. Well... I practiced letting go of everything, asking the Lord to come and empty me of myself, my thoughts, fears, concerns, etc. I wanted to be completely empty in every way so that I could just sit in His presence and BE. It was pretty difficult at first cuz I'm a gal who likes efficiency, i find satisfactory in killing multiple birds with one stone. Haha. I like to get the MOST out of every single hour of the day, sucking life dry. So the thought of sitting and doing nothing for an hour made me a little nervous to be honest... until I realized that by doing nothing I was doing everything.

On Monday I sat... quietly. "What next?", I thought. I asked the Lord to protect my mind from the enemy's thoughts and my own so that I would ONLY hear His voice. I began to request that He'd reveal things to me or that I'd have a major epiphany I could share with the masses. Then gently but sternly I felt as thought the Lord said..."Who are you doing this for Lindsey?". Wow, my Papa really knows how to set me straight :) Suddenly I realized my motives had been off and He was beautifully drawing me back to the core of my existence. In this moment I could ask for nothing more than to honor Him with my silence, obedience and faithfulness... what He wanted to say or not say was His business. I would worship Him regardless because He is worthy of our praise... end of story. But what came of this precious time with Him was way more than I could have ever expected or anticipated.

Excerpt from my meditation journal: "Sometimes an intentional 'nothing' is the stillness in which something unseen and beautiful is being birthed to life."

I could spend this time going deeper into Foster's biblical research of Meditation, or the personal interpretation of thousands of scholars over the years... but more than our "evidence", this has to be a journey you desire to take for yourself. Yes, there is great value and treasure to be found in spending devoted time at the feet of our Savior... but YOUR eyes must become open to this truth. And I hope for your sake, your families sake, the people you do or could influence, and for the sake of the kingdom of heaven that you at least search for yourself.

"Christian meditation, very simply, is the ability to hear God's voice and obey his word...the truth of the matter is that the GREAT GOD of the universe, the Creator of all things, desires our fellowship." Foster

Sometimes it's quite mind-boggling to me that we could just quietly sit alone with an invisible God... and it blesses His heart? Wow! I mean, how many of us have ever had those awkward silent moments with someone we liked, respected, loved or were in awe of? Can you imagine what we'd say if our favorite singer, actor, or historical figure were to spend time with us? We'd probably announce it to the facebook world, tweet about it a few hundred times and try to decide what in the world we wanted to say to them so we wouldn't look foolish. But this is the CREATOR of ALL... and He's telling us we don't have to or need to do anything but sit in His presence and receive with an open heart, mind and soul.

In those moments with Him I wasn't necessarily being taught how to become a good child of the King.... but I was receiving His love in such a way that I was becoming that beloved daughter who takes delight and ultimate pleasure from spending time with her Dad. BE LOVED. It's simple. We are human beings not human doings. I guarantee that your time outside of this intentionally focused time will be even more productive than ever before so that even the mundane will become a beautiful worship to him as you begin to see how you fit into the bigger picture of it all as a child of God. Peace, balance, and grace become the elements that allow you to breath in deep the life you were created for. (This is called Otium Sanctum or "holy leisure" referring to a sense of balance in the life, an ability to be at peace through the activities of the day, an ability to rest and take time to enjoy beauty, an ability to pace ourselves).

"The detachment from the confusion all around us is in order to have a richer attachment to God. Christian meditation leads us to the inner wholeness necessary to give ourselves to God freely". Foster

As I read further into Foster's perspective and searched for myself in my own time in stillness, I began to wonder why meditation seems so threatening to us. Foster believes it's because, "it boldly calls us to enter into the living presence of God for ourselves." I know that years ago I used to avoid being alone at all costs because I knew I'd have to think about the way I live my life and honestly my flesh did not want to change... after all, it was fully satisfied. But my spirit was becoming weary of calling out for something more... doing all it could to shout above the madness I had become so comfortable in. The truth is... I was afraid. I was fearful that I wouldn't hear God's voice if "i tried", and even more worried of what the Lord might say if He did decide to speak to me.

What I didn't realize at the time was how madly the Savior loved me, how deeply He desired to connect with me, and how much He deserved ALL of me. He wanted me to believe and know that He really IS everything He says He is... He wanted to satisfy me like nothing else in this whole world could. He wanted to fill me up with true life so that I could walk out the rest of my days searching His great mysteries, digging deeper into His love, and becoming fully aware of His heart for this broken world.

And I hope when I say this you accept the complete authenticity of it... yes, the world has lots of tasty treats to offer that "feel good" and bring some sort of temporary comfort or ease, but there is nothing...NOTHING...that compares to even a moment with our Papa. Just us and Him. No preacher, speaker, author, radio station, relative, actor, musician, or lover can replace this time He desires to spend with us alone. Knowledge and understanding is good... but He wants our undivided attention so He can properly penetrate our hearts and leave us hungry for more as we posture ourselves before Him.

"The body, mind, and the spirit are inseparable. Tension in the spirit is telegraphed in body language. I actually have witnessed people go through an entire worship service vigorously chewing gum without the slightest awareness of their deep inner tension. Not only does outward posture reflect the inward state, it can also help to nurture the inner attitude of prayer. If inwardly we are fraught with distractions and anxiety, a consciously chosen posture of peace and relaxation will have a tendency to calm our inner turmoil." Foster

I do believe that we experience anxiety, fear, and turmoil because we are not deeply connecting with the source of that true peace. It's almost as if our soul and body are trying to tell us something. Unfortunately, we live in a world that quickly slaps a name on our uneasy feelings and hands over some numbing medication or a suggests we take a vacation from our problems :( I'm trying not to generalize here... but might I suggest we try meditating in His presence first instead of medicating???

The deeper my conscience has been going into the heart of God as I tap into this heavenly realm... the more aware I become of the perverse desires of my flesh. You would think this would bring guilt, depression, and sadness upon my soul.... but oh the contrary! I now find joy in the divine discovery of anything within me that might hinder seeing or knowing the great love of God so that I might throw these things off and receive even more of His goodness! As I draw near Him over time I begin to see myself how He sees me and that, in turn, becomes how I truly desire to live! There is freedom, healing, restoration, redemption, and glory found in His arms... why would we want to be anywhere else?

Richard Foster lists four different types of meditation that I'll share with you as a guide to get you going. I pray that you will plunge into the inner depths with HIM beloved.

1- Meditation upon scripture: Foster suggests we set aside all tendencies toward arrogance and with a humble heart receive the word addressed to us. Accept the scripture and ponder it in your heart, even if it's one chapter a week...enter the story, not as a passive observer, but as an active participant. Also remember that Christ is truly with us to teach, heal, and forgive.

2- Re-collection: It is a time to become still, to enter into the recreating silence, to allow the fragmentation of our minds to become centered. It might be good to start off by surrendering, releasing and letting go (palms down), then move on to a position to receive (palms up) not asking for anything... allow the Lord to commune with you.

3- Meditation upon creation: Foster strongly states that this is NOT infantile pantheism, but a majestic monotheism in which the great Creator of the universe shows us something of his glory through his creation. Personally I greatly enjoy my moments with God in nature and feel more alive there than any concrete building I've ever set foot in. Even the birds are singing praises.

4- Meditation upon the events of our time: This time is good to seek and perceive the significance about what is going on in our world and find our spiritual obligation to penetrate the inner meaning of these events, not to gain power but to gain prophetic perspective.

Overall, this week has been a huge eye opener for me in the world of meditation and our ability to connect with the Father in this simple way. I recognize the biblical value as well as the core desire to just be where God is. He is speaking every moment of every day, but how often do we become still enough to hear His voice? I desire to now apply some form of meditation into my daily life... not seeing it as another thing to put on my "to do" list, but instead acknowledging that absolutely nothing can replace that time with Him or satisfy my being like He can in His presence alone. He is the purification process in which our oxygen flows through that determines the quality of air we release the rest of the day to the world.



Peter

One of the most significant things about Peter, I believe, was His name. Side note: I encourage you to research the meaning of your name if you don't already know. What does God call you and why? What does He say that He believes about you... and do you live accordingly? Recognizing this could be a significant step in discovering your identity in HIM.

At first Peter's name was Simon which means, "to hear or be heard". And at one point when called by Jesus, he called him Peter which means, "rock". Now, there is much debate to what He meant by changing His name and what Jesus meant when He said, "On this rock I will build my church, and the gates of hell will not prevail it..." Some say Jesus was referring to himself, others say to Peter's faith. I say probably both. I believe Jesus was prophetically speaking life into Peter and in turn Peter was beginning to see His identity in Him. At this time Jesus was still on earth, but He would soon be gone physically. Although we would lose His body, we would forever have the ability to house the spirit of Christ within us. So, in a way... He has built His church through us on HIM, the solid rock. Peter definitely had his place in the early stages of the growth of the church and went to great lengths spreading the authentic gospel of Christ before He became a martyr in the end and was crucified upside down because He didn't think He was worthy enough to die the same as His Savior.

Although, If Peter had a biblical resume it probably wouldn't have gotten him very far in the church today. It might have said something like this: spokesperson for Jesus, missionary, served some prison time, cut off a soldier's ear, denied Christ 3 times, refused foot washing by Jesus until He called him out on it, and walked on water until he became afraid and took His eyes of Jesus. Sadly, I don't know many churches that would hire Peter to clean their toilets...(I just want to quickly point out the irony in this picture. I took this when I was visiting Israel a few years ago. Here, we are in Capernaum beside the Sea of Galilee at the home of this "beautiful" modern-day church. But what you don't see is that it is actually built upon rock... also known historically as the house in which Peter used to live in. Somehow we've built an actual church building where the real church began and was designed to remain... long after it's founder was gone.)

This man's life has taught me a few things this week. 1- I think we have strayed far from the church Jesus designed to be built upon the rock. 2- Peter may have initially refused Jesus to clean his feet, but when He told Him that if He doesn't then He would have no part with Him... Peter quickly asks Jesus to wash his hands and head as well. 3- He may have taken his eyes off Jesus for a moment and sunk into the sea, but honestly... He was the ONLY one on the boat that even believed it was possible and gave it a shot. 4- Sure, he may have done some stupid things... but this man loved the Lord with everything He had, even to the point of death.

What really is the point of arriving safely at death? Do we wish to please the Father while we are on earth or are we all just waiting for our time to come so He can please us in heaven? How can we call ourselves successful if we keep doing the same things we already know how to do? Failure is when we stop seeking or stop wanting more. Man, He desires SO MUCH for you in this life. I challenge you (and myself) this week to DIG deeper into the heart of God by spending time sitting in His presence and finding contentment by being His beloved child. Will you humbly let Jesus wash your feet? Will YOU be a water walker? Even if it means you may fall a time or two... or three? Every single human being is so blessed to be a witness of the King, to have the very fingerprint of the God of the universe on our souls... no matter who you are, where you come from, or what you have done- HE LOVES YOU.

Training for half-marathon

One of the most valuable lessons I've learned this week is "PACE YOURSELF". And the funny thing is a few weeks ago a good friend told me that God is setting the pace for me and make sure I run with Him to that pace or I will wear out. Associating the physical with the spiritual is becoming a common theme in my relationship with God. Haha. Anyway... I ended up running for 3 miles, 3 days straight... did yoga yesterday... and Cardio core work today. Tomorrow I've decided to let my body REST and believe you me I am going to enjoy every second of it :)

The twelve begins...

Welcome to the new blog everyone!!!!!
I don't know about you, but ever since 2012 began I've been feeling this incredible momentum that seems to be picking up fast. I sense the kingdom of heaven is advancing quickly and God is desperate for His children to become broken vessels strengthened by Him, trained, refined, purified, transformed, redeemed, restored, freed, healed, fit and ready to serve Him in complete abandonment! This is why I am here. And if you are REALLY ready to go deeper... if you have HUNGER for the Lord you can not satisfy anywhere else... then I'd love for you to run down this path with me with a pace He's set before us. This next challenge will go even further in preparing us mentally, physically, spiritually, and emotionally for what's ahead!!! As we begin to give our mind, body, and soul over to the glory of the Lord... the total transformation from the inside-out will be the most exciting adventure of your life thus far. If you are someone who doesn't quite feel the excitement of God gathering His kiddos together and prepping us then set time aside for HIM... clear your mind, listen, be patient, dig deep, ask for more hunger, be faithful, claim His promises, and praise Him no matter where you are in life. I'm telling you, He doesn't want anyone to miss out on this!!!

What exactly is "the twelve"?
There are three main things that I felt the Lord was calling me to do this season. After last year's blog: the 90 day extreme... I learned a lot about who God really is and who He says I am as a child. I also learned how connected the mind, body, soul and spirit are and how important it is for us to recognize this so we can truly glorify Him with EVERYTHING. I do strongly believe that when we see God for the truth of who He is and see us in His image we become recklessly abandoned for this faith and hope letting go of all that holds us back from serving Him wholeheartedly. With that said.... There are 3 main areas this little challenge or season will be focusing on.

If you still aren't sure who our Papa is or who you are as His child then I recommend starting with the first blog: http://ninetydayxtreme.blogspot.com/. For those of you who have been following that one, you might be ready for the next step. The "training" period. During the next 12 weeks I'm going to take the necessary steps for God to train my body, my mind, and my spirit. I want to be a fine-tuned organ playing beautiful music for His kingdom, I want to be a double-edged sword ready for the spiritual battles at any moment, I want to be sharp, quick, prepared so that I may honor Him and be the disciple I know He's calling us to be. Will you come with me on this journey??

The Story...
It all started back in November while I was in New Zealand working with YWAM. I had the privilege of being part of an amazing "training base" where people come from all over the world to go deeper in their relationship with the Lord and get prepared for global missions.

Often times we identify with the lives of the twelve disciples galavanting around the world with just a few personal items never really certain what we will eat or where we will sleep or what kind of shananigans we will run into....but God ALWAYS provides. I think this is what has given me such a love for these twelve men who followed the commission of the Lord so wholeheartedly. Not only did they believe in "the mission" but they believed and knew the main character of the story in such a way that their love for his sacrifice and heart for the world would drive them to giving up their own and following him.

One gorgeous day in new zealand I decided to go for a run. As I was jogging I felt like the Lord gently whispered, "You're a pretty good sprinter, you know that?". To which I replied, "Awe, thanks God...I like to go fast". Then he said, "Long-distance is not exactly your forte, is it?". And well... it was true. Ever since I was a young girl I avoided the long runs... my side would start aching, my knees would get sore, and frankly I was bored out of my mind! Then I truly felt like God said, "I want you to become a long-distance runner for me." All the sudden it hit me. Just like in the physical, I was doing the same thing in the spiritual with God. I had been going from one "good thing" to the next, sacrificing the bare minimum, giving very little commitment, moving on quickly before I got too bored. I realized in that moment there was so much I was missing out on by not going the distance....

Right then, when I made the decision to obey and go long distance for God something broke in the spiritual. I could almost physically feel the chains fall off and a new sense of freedom as I made this commitment... then something crazy happened. Believe it or not, I actually ran longer that day than I had in years and ever since then I have not had a pain in my side or knee trouble from running! God also told me that in order to transition into this new "running" position He was going to have to train me... much like one does for a marathon. Just a few days later I was talking with a friend of mine about goals for the year and she mentioned running a half-marathon. That day I decided to run the music city half marathon this coming April! Oddly enough it has a 12 week training program that begins today!

Oh... but that's not all. Also while I was in New Zealand God began to bring the "Spiritual Disciplines" to mind again. The more I began to research, study, and walk out wholeness... I saw how elemental these disciplines were to this journey. As soon as I returned in December I ordered Richard Foster's "Celebration of Disciplines" only to find out there are actually 12 of them!!! Can you believe it??? Is this starting to connect yet? Right then and there I knew a new challenge was developing that would take us even deeper into the spiritual realm and the heart of God, higher into the heavenlies, and closer to His throne.

So... there you go. You are welcome to join me in any or all of this or just read along in the blogs :) Either way we will all be challenged and I know find more treasure in Him the deeper we go.
Today as I was praying into this challenge I thought it might be neat if God sent 11 other people to do this with me. That way there is 12 of us, like the disciples :) Then, once we are finished we can encourage 12 others with these same type of challenges and so on.

The Week's Schedule:
1- Studying The Twelve Disciples: Every week I am going to take a different disciple and research them a little bit to go deeper into their lives... and how to apply the things they learned with how we are called to live today! Here's a list of them: (I'm just gonna start with Peter and work my way down)

• Peter
• Andrew
• James the Greater
• James the Lesser
• John
• Philip
• Bartholomew
• Matthew
• Thomas
• Thaddeus
• Simon
• Judas Iscariot

2- Studying the Spiritual Disciplines: I am taking the Disciplines mentioned in Richard Foster's "Celebration of Discipline" and actually practicing them. I'll take one discipline a week, focus on that one, apply it to my daily life... and then ask the Lord what ways it is relevant for us today. I'm also hoping to get some revelation and simply honor God with my time, body, money, heart, etc. Here's a list of them: (I'm starting with Meditation and working my way down. This week I'll be meditating for one hour solid a day.)

The inward disciplines-
meditation
prayer
fasting
study

The outward disiplines-
simplicity
solitude
submission
service

The corporate disciplines-
confession
worship
guidance
celebration

3-Training for the half-marathon: During this time I'll be running 3-5 days a week doing yoga, some fast twitch, a little weight training, and plyo on the off days. If you need me to help you with a schedule just let me know!

On top of this I'm still trying to find a good healthy balance in life. I do believe that God wants to nourish us and the enemy wants to toxify us... and that shady little booger will do it any way he can: through our food, what we watch, what we hear, read... etc. I have decided to not watch anything throughout the week except the occasional movie on the weekends. I also want to try to eat as whole, raw, and fresh as possible during the week allowing myself some tasty treat on the weekend. You may find a different plan that works for you... but if you need help, please let me know!!

Excerpts from "Celebration of Discipline":
"God has given us the disciplines of the spiritual life as a means of receiving his grace. The Disciplines allow us to place ourselves before God so that he can transform us....

They are our way of sowing to the Spirit. The Disciplines are God's way of getting us into the ground; they put us where he can work within us and transform us. By themselves the SD can do nothing; they can only get us to the place where soething can be done. they are God's means of grace. the inner righteousness we seek is not something that is poured on our heads. God has ordained the Disciplines of the spiritual life as the means by which we place ourselves where he can bless us....

Our world is hungry for genuinely changed people."